What is your burning question and what have you learned so
far, or what are you thinking about?
What do I know and what do I think about my question? What do I need to look for?
How has my past influenced my identity, insecurities, and the way I
make decisions?
I’m been looking at how the loss of my memory at 16 has
shaped my identity, insecurities, and the way I make decisions. My burning question is a result and related to
my literacy autobiography.
There are three areas that I want to look at and ask my
childhood friends about:
1.) How did attending Catholic School from k-12 shape my
identity and thought processes?
2.) How did music, and my parents fierce encouragement, contributed
to my insecurities?
3.) How did I make decisions after my accident? What did I decide about myself? How did it serve me? How did it hinder me?
Some random thoughts and questions:
- I wasn’t encouraged to think for myself
- I have little experience figuring out what it is that I want and/or how I feel about something
- I was taught very ridged ideas of what’s right and what’s wrong
- My parents put me on display to be judged, and I never ever felt good enough
- I chose to buy into society’s perception of what the ideal life looks like. By stating that I chose it, I can own it more; however, for the past 7 years I felt like I just did was I was supposed to do (by society’s standards). It didn’t serve me and now I’m looking at what I really want for myself and for my future.
- That I don’t have many opinions and am extremely open, but in a way that feels like I have few foundations. I am always involved in conversations where I’m listening newly, and can’t contribute or move the conversation forward. I never feel good enough.
- I have the ability to not think; to shut off. I’d like to trace this back and figure out when and how it was developed and perfected. How did it serve me? How did it hinder me?
- People regularly peg me as a prim, southern bell. This is not who I am. How can I portray my personality? What stops me from being who I am? What am I afraid of?
- There are several examples of how extreme some of the life choices I’ve made are. For example, being a vocal performance major (extravert, expressive, present) and then switching to history (quiet, removed, researcher). I gave up music and singing for 10 years and I’m beginning to sing again; I’m coming full circle.
- I gave up music; I gave up my dream. Why? Is that reason true?
- Music = creating my history/my life; History = focus on other people; facts; safe
- How does my Legacy Project play into my story? I’m giving other people’s legacy a permanent home. My contributors are also losing something.
- I don’t remember the books I read in youth. How do books/characters shape your identity? What lessons/explorations have I missed by not remembering?
Literacy
Autobiography:
Underline different domains (school, camp, home, workplace,
bedroom) that you’re addressing.
What were the literacy events you encountered?
I’d like to connect as many dots as possible. I thank Marissa, Bird and Danielle for
pointing out how different aspects of my life have influenced who I am today
and how I’ve gotten here.
Haley- I am in awe of your work. And when you write this memoir, as a guide to people who are reconstructing their identity after a head injury, I expect the same dedication on the front page. We don't have to be on the first tier, we can be in the back pages where you wax on about the National Writing Project, etc. Silly, I know, but are you going to make charts? You know, like to hang up with a main theme and see how many of them overlap? I'm such a visual person, having major life questions in front of me that I can see where I've repeated themes might help you find some of the connections.
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